262: How to Avoid the Friend Zone (Part 3)


How to Avoid the Friend Zone (Part 3) with Nate AdlamIn this episode, Jay continues his discussion with by Nate Adlam to address the question: What makes the friend zone such a dreadful place to be?




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Episode Title: How to Avoid the Friend Zone (Part 3)


Guest: Nate Adlam Follow Him on Twitter



  • “You can learn a lot from bad relationships.” – Nate Adlam


  • “The friend zone is not a negative place, unless I make it one.” – Jay Mayo


Question We Address and Answer:

  • What makes the friend zone such a dreadful place to be?


Key Lessons and Takeaways:

  • The value in seeking wise counsel.
  • Why the friend zone can be such a bad place.
  • How to change our perspective of the friend zone.
  • The danger of keeping our true feelings hidden.
  • Learning how to accept that we may only be friends with someone and nothing more.



  • Jay explains why he believes the friend zone should be a good place.


Past Episode Referenced:


Book Recommendations:




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  • Autumn
    December 22, 2015

    I think it’s great to be friends. Ah, friends. I’m really, really good at being a good friend. I won’t say it’s always easy but I can do it. Being in the friendzone with a man is fine, if that’s where you want to be and where he wants to be. Pretty good, actually! But if you or he wants more, it’s just not a relationship that can last.

    I wish we could all be brothers and sisters together. But there seems to be this black and white choice sometimes, friend or spouse. At least for Christians or from what I learn listening to these podcasts. It seems some want that spouse and well, don’t want to spend energy on anyone else until they find him or her. Others, don’t want marriage but don’t want to be without romance indefinitely.

    I think men and women can certainly be friends, but it’s usually more successful when both have significant others and are in happy, stable relationships. We are creatures of the flesh, after all. We can manage that, but it’s easier if you’re a full-filled happy person on all levels.

    Actually, that’s true of same-sex friendships too! Happy people are better friends and better able to give to others.

    • Jay
      December 24, 2015

      I totally believe that a man and woman must be on the same page. Either they are friends or they are more. When one person has a desire for more than what’s been agreed upon, they must be honest and share how they feel with the other person.

      I think men and women can be just friends too. Have a mutual respect and understanding of their friendship or relationship is the key. When both people know that they are just friends, there should not be any issues, whether the other person has a significant other or not.

      I agree that friendships with the opposite sex are usually easier to manage when one or both people are in a happy and fulfilling relationship.

      “Happy people are better friends and better able to give to others.”

      That is REAL TALK!!!

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us Autumn!

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