25: How Men Feel About Quick Sex vs. Having to Wait



I don’t believe anyone doubts that’s a fact.


However, many people believe that men’s love for sex makes them incapable of waiting for it.


If you would like to know how men truly feel about getting quick sex vs. having to wait for it, you must listen to the latest episode in the MenChat series, ‘How Men Feel About Quick Sex vs. Having to Wait’:



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Episode Title: How Men Feel About Quick Sex vs. Having to Wait


The Men:



  • “I believe all relationships start with sex, before they become relationships.” – Rami


  • “There will never be a relationship between me and a woman I have sex with on the first date.” – Randy


  • “If a man can sniff out that a woman feels obligated to give him some, he’s going to take advantage of it. Most guys aren’t going to walk away from that.” – Kyle


  • “If after the fourth or fifth time the sex isn’t good, I know I can’t get in a relationship with that woman.” – Rami”


  • “The sex has to be good, because no one wants to be in a relationship if the sex isn’t good.” – Kyle


  • “The type of guy I am, I was an athlete and it always came easy. So to stand apart from the crowd, you have to make me wait!” – Randy


  • “I don’t need Steve Harvey to tell me that I should wait three months before sleeping with a woman.” – Kyle


  • Brothas, you can’t compare women. There’s no two women from your sexual past that do the same thing.” – Kyle


I Can’t Believe He Said That:

I dislike having to wait for sex. I dislike it very intensely. I have a limit actually, where if by the third date we haven’t had sex…I’m out! I will not wait pass the third date.” – Rami


Show Some Love:

Please leave a comment or a private message answering the following question:

Do you believe it’s possible to have emotionless sex?


  • Autumn
    July 14, 2014

    I think anyone can have emotionless sex. Usually if it’s not ongoing. But people who fall out of love have emotionless sex all the time. Or they have emotions, but it’s not always a positive emotion. Could be just boredom. At least that’s how a few of my married (one no longer married) friends described it! So it’s possible.

    In terms of a new couple, what if the person is having sex with multiple partners? It’s hard to have emotions with three or more people. But sure, it’s possible.

    Also, it’s not always the sex that bonds people. According to this podcast, the sex isn’t always even good. I think it’s intimacy that bonds people along with the sex and hormones. It’s seeing a person naked, it’s waking up together, all those little things that come along with sexual intimacy. Seeing them in all those unguarded moments.

    But I do think a woman can have emotionless sex. Just not often. And it takes work. No hanging out, no phone, no cuddles, no showers, just slam, stir, thank you sir. Peace out. Seriously. Now most women I know aren’t socialized or used to being satisfied with that. But it can certainly be done. Just is unusual but may not be as unusual as men think. Even if I had emotionless sex, I certainly would never let him know that my emotions weren’t in it. I wouldn’t want to hurt his feelings.

    • Jay
      July 15, 2014

      Hey Autumn!

      Thank you so much for sharing your answer. I truly appreciate it.

      I agree that there is much more than sex that bonds people.

      However, I also believe many people don’t understand the ‘weight’ of having sex. There are so many people who treat sex so flippantly. Personally, I believe that doing so is extremely dangerous.

  • Destiny's Truth
    July 18, 2014

    Jay your guest on this MenChat podcast, 12 Kyle, Rami and Randy, were very honest and exhibited how diverse the viewpoints that men have in regards to quick sexual encounters and having to wait before having sex. Randy was very direct and narrow in his thoughts, 12 Kyle was very balanced and Rami was very, very extreme and shocking in many of his answers to the questions. However, these responses I feel truly reflect how men really feel. I enjoyed this podcast because it allowed women to see and know that men are very different and can be fair in their judgments about themselves, as well. Jay, another great show! I laughed at Rami’s shocking responses, but I had to respect his position after he expounded on his own personal background. Randy made it clear that men do not understand how a woman can go from being modest and respectful to just being wild, like his experience with his high school girlfriend. I could try feel his pain from that experience. Then 12 Kyle pulled it all together with his many insightful statements about men being equally accountable when they have quick sex too. It was wonderful that all the men agreed that if a woman desired to wait until marriage to have sex that standard would be respected and valued, but it would be important to know this very early in the relationship.

    In response to the question, “Do you believe it is possible to have emotionless sex?” My answer is yes I do believe that it is possible to have emotionless sex, if you do not value your body and see the encounter as nothing more than a means to an end. Why would someone violate their bodies and expose themselves to the pain that often occurs and not have any genuine feelings for the person they are performing the act with? That is the question I would ask when it comes to emotionless sex.

    • Jay
      July 21, 2014

      This is such an amazing comment Destiny!

      I am so glad that you enjoyed the guests and the answers they provided.

      I agree that if a man or woman plans to abstain from sex until marriage should share that with someone before they enter into a relationship. It provides the other person with full disclosure.

      Your question is a GREAT one!!! That is definitely a question that needs to be asked. Thank you so much for sharing it.

  • Awesomely Over-Zealous
    August 5, 2014

    Ha men CAN wait – my bf waited for weeks before he got any nookie. It was after I read, Act Like A Lady Think Like A Man by Steve Harvey – I felt empowered, lmao. Love that man! It was fun and built anticipation – it’s like hunting for prey. I think it depends what you want out of the relationship or during that moment; if you want booty as long as you’re both under the same understanding that this relationship has this intended purpose you should be OK. Just don’t catch feelings if you do then you need to evaluate what’s happening and by then sometimes it’s too late. I think if women use sex to “hook” a man that’s when things get twisted and feelings get hurt because sex needs to be either the end itself, nothing more nothing less; but never the means to the ends if a relationship is your end. Great topic, I could ramble on but I won’t! Have a great one Jay! -Iva

    • Jay
      August 5, 2014

      Hey Iva!

      Thank you so much for swinging by and sharing your thoughts. It means more to me than you know!

      You’re right, there are definitely men who can wait. No doubt about that.

      “I think it depends what you want out of the relationship or during that moment.”

      That’s the key right there and once someone knows what they want, they need to directly and verbally communicate it to the person they are with. That way they both can be on the same page.

      Oh yeah! Using sex as a “hook” is a very dangerous game. Like you stated, if a relationship is supposed to be the “end” and a man nor a woman should dangle sex in front of the other person as if it’s the “end”.

      That’s why open and honest communication is a must.

      Thank you again for taking the time out to listen to the podcast and share your thoughts.

      Everyone who comments here on the site gets a shout out on the podcast. So, expect to hear your name on an upcoming podcast!

      • Awesomely Over-Zealous
        August 5, 2014

        Anytime! You’ll see me more around here no worries πŸ™‚ Yes, Yes, Yes to honest and open communication; it isn’t always easy but necessary! πŸ™‚ OOO well lucky for you I work for 8 hours in an office that is too quiet for my taste so I am always listening to something, looking forward to my shoutout! πŸ˜› Take Care! -Iva

        • Jay
          August 5, 2014

          Great! I so look forward to interacting with you more.

          You’re right. Honest and open communication is a must, but so many people seem afraid of it. I still don’t get that.

          Nice! I hope that you enjoy the episodes. If there is ever anything you’d like to hear addressed or discussed on the podcast, please let me know.

          In fact, if you’re interested, it would be an honor and a pleasure to have you on as a guest. Think about it and let me know if that’s something you’d like to do.

          Oh yeah! You’ll definitely be getting a shout out. It’ll be on the episode that’s released this coming Friday.

          Thanks again Iva!

          • Awesomely Over-Zealous
            August 6, 2014

            OH that would be AWESOME! πŸ™‚ Why thank you thank you for the consideration Jay!

          • Jay
            August 6, 2014

            Of course! I will send you an email shortly. Thanks!

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