62: Why You Must Date Yourself

Woman on a date with herself

You have not truly lived until you have dated yourself.


Sounds a little crazy, right?


As crazy as it may sound, dating yourself can truly change your life for the better!


Most people love going out on dates…with other people.


Yet, when it comes to going out in public to dine or catch a movie solo…some people are totally against it.


If you’re one of those people, all I ask is that you open your mind for a moment.


Don’t completely shut out the idea of going on a date with yourself, especially before hearing about the benefits that can result from doing it.


If you’re someone who is totally open to dating yourself, you’re going to love what I’m about to share with you.


Regardless of what side of the fence you may be on, please listen to the latest podcast episode and discover how dating yourself can not only improve your relationships, but change your life for the better too!



If you know someone who can benefit from this podcast, please share it with them by pressing ‘click to tweet’ below.


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Episode Title: Why You Must Date Yourself


Guests: Kevin RobinsonFollow Him on TwitterListen to His Podcast ‘Kevin Hates Hip Hop’


Music: GS – I Remember



  • I think the problem is, when you have a relationship or you’re always in a relationship you don’t know how to be by yourself.” – Kevin Robinson


  • “Your own personal company can be your best company.” – Kevin Robinson


  • “When you figure out who you are and what your worth is, then you’re ready to have a relationship.” – Kevin Robinson


Key Lessons:

  • What it means to date yourself
  • The importance of reaching the point where you can face and address your personal demons head on
  • How to overcome the fear of going out on dates in public by yourself
  • How dating yourself can prepare you for your next relationship


Hot Topics & Takeaways:

  • The importance of investing time in yourself
  • The greatest benefit of taking time to date yourself
  • The benefits that can be gained by journaling


Dangers and Difficulties:

  • The danger of trying to find yourself in a relationship or another person
  • Why it is required for you to resolve any issues you may have with your parents before seeking a relationship


Experience is the Best Teacher:

  • Jay explains how peer pressure and his fear of rejection led to him spending more time alone and getting to know himself better
  • Kevin shares the lessons he learned when he took time out to be by himself
  • Kevin explains how he discovered that his relationship with his mother was negatively impacting his relationships with women and how he was able to change that
  • Jay shares why it was a hurdle for him to come to terms with the fact that no woman he dates will ever be perfect
  • Kevin shares about the mental and physical detox he experienced in the summer of 2013 and the impact that it had on his life


Hold Yourself Accountable:

Focus on developing and increasing your self-love.


Apply the Principles:

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Psalm 139:14 (ESV)


Take Action Now:

  1. Make a decision to increase the love you have for yourself.
  2. Invite God to be a part of the process.
  3. Plan to face your personal demons, one at a time.
  4. Start journaling and reading books that uplift you.
  5. Challenge yourself to do something by yourself that you’ve never done before.
  6. Remain prayerful and positive.


Show Some Love:

Please leave me a comment or a private message answering the following questions:

Have you ever gone on a date by yourself?


  • Autumn
    November 15, 2014

    Thanks so much for featuring my question! I asked it in the comments of one of the last podcasts so I meant everyone to to see it. I’m curious as to people’s answers.

    This was such an interesting podcast. First, it’s just great to hear men discuss stuff that’s deep like this. I really do hope other men do comment here below. Like Kevin, I’m a Virgo and I feel I’ve been dating myself a long time! In fact, it’s probably been one long love affair with me (and God) and always will be. But there is room for another person too.

    It’s so hard to put yourself first when you love others. When I’m busy at work, when I’m stressed, when dating, it’s really hard for me to carve out that me time. But just like (I also listed to the Jackie and Stefana Bledsoe podcast about marriage) in a long-term relationship you have to keep dating your partner, you have to keep dating yourself. That time is essential to growth.

    I’m just coming off an insanely busy time at work and I hadn’t taken that time and it was not good. I made such poor decisions. This podcast was a timely reminder for me to get back to me. Go to a movie, hike, read a book, cook, meditate, whatever is grounding and just do it. Thanks for the reminder!

    • Jay
      November 15, 2014

      You are very welcome Autumn. It was a great question!

      I’m curious what other people’s answers are too. Hopefully, some people will share their answers.

      I am so happy that you enjoyed the discussion. Kevin and I were both very transparent and honest. I really enjoyed the opportunity I had to share many of the things I’ve been experiencing with Kevin, you and the other R.E.A.L. Lovers who listened.

      I’m right there with you two. I’ve been dating myself and it’s been me and God for quite some time too. Like you stated though, I would like to make room for the special woman in my life someday too.

      You’re right, it can be challenging to find that balance between dating ourselves and dating our partners. Lordwilling, we will be blessed with partners who understand the necessity of that balance and will help us with maintaining it.

      Wow! Look at God! He is always on time and He always knows what we need and when we need it. Knowing that this podcast has had such a positive impact on you makes me so happy. Thank you for sharing that Autumn.

      Oh yeah! Take that time out for yourself and have some fun!

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